


please don't leave me ('cause i don't know what i'd do without you)

by georgiehensley



Category: Backstage (TV 2016)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Angst, Hospitals, Implied Relationships, M/M, Sad, Sick Character, Temporary Character Death
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-15
Updated: 2016-05-15
Packaged: 2018-06-08 12:24:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,213
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6854533
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/georgiehensley/pseuds/georgiehensley
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>
  <i>it happens when jax is sitting in class.</i>
</p>
<p>or, the one where jax's color vision begins to slip away, and he panics.</p>
            </blockquote>





	please don't leave me ('cause i don't know what i'd do without you)

**Author's Note:**

> this ship doesn't have enough fanfiction, so i decided to write some more - in the form of an angsty, sad soulmate au.
> 
> i mean, the topic of death really can't be avoided with this ship since the last episode literally mentioned the possibility of miles not making it another year. so, yeah, this features hospitalized miles and a frantic, worried jax. hope it doesn't make you cry too much.

it happens when jax is sitting in class. it’d started out as a fairly normal day, for the most part - except for the fact that miles wasn’t there. but he knows why, he gets it - miles is in the hospital, he finally got a kidney donor. today’s the day of the surgery.

jax didn’t think anything would go wrong. and really, there’s no way of him knowing exactly what could be happening.

except for, well, _that thing_.

he’s staring at the screen of his phone, working on the latest composition assignment, when suddenly the world seems to fade around him. the colors seem to drain from his phone, and at first he thinks it’s just a problem with the screen...

until he realizes that it’s _him_.

he’s starting to see the world in black and white again.

_**miles.** _

“shit.” he mumbles, picking his head up, eyes widening in realization, completely careless of the fact that he just swore in the middle of class.

“what’s wrong?” alya asks from where she sits next to him. he doesn’t respond. “jax!”

“jax, is something wrong?” park says, stepping over towards jax as he watches the color begin to drain from his face.

“i-i have to go.” he says, standing and packing his things, shaking his head as he does so. “i can’t stay here.”

“jax, what’s going on?” alya tries again.

“my colors are fading!” jax snaps back, catching the attention of other students. he sighs, ducking his head, cheeks heating with a blush as he realizes what he basically just admitted to his classmates. he speaks more softly as he continues, “i think something’s wrong with miles.”

“do you need a ride?” park asks.

“you can’t drive me to the hospital.” jax argues back. “school’s still on.”

“if you’re losing your soulmate, i might be able to.” park says. jax smiles slightly.

“you would do that?” he asks.

“of course.” park says, smiling back.

“i’ll go too.” alya says. “miles is my friend too.”

“i’ll be right back.” park says. “just, try to stay here for now, okay? i have see if someone can fill in for me.”

~

once in the car, jax begins to shake, the anxiety overwhelming him as he stares at the colorless traffic lights and and signs that pass by in a blur as they move.

“i can’t see color.” he says, feeling his eyes begin to well up with tears. “but it’s going so slowly... why is it going so slowly?”

“maybe because he’s still trying to hold on.” alya says from where she sits in the backseat. “he might make it.”

“he’s not going to.” jax says, shaking his head. “he can’t, he’s too sick.” he sighs, hitting the dashboard in frustration.

“hey, calm down.” park says. “try to stay positive, okay?”

“i can’t!” jax cries out. “my soulmate is dying and all i can do is just... let it happen.” he lets out a shaky sigh, tears now starting to slip down his face. letting out a sigh of her own, alya leans forward, placing a hand on jax’s shoulder. he doesn’t shrug the contact off.

“it’s going to be okay.” alya says, trying to reassure him. “he’s holding on for you.”

~

in the hospital, jax feels himself growing more and more anxious. as soon as they find out where miles’ room is, jax is off in a rush, running through blurry white hallways as he hurries to reunite with his soulmate and see him one last time. alya and park attempt to chase after him, but in the end, they let him go, instead choosing to follow at a slower pace. they have no idea what he must be feeling right now, so they let him run.

it isn’t long before jax comes to a stop in front of the room, somehow managing to read the numbers through the blur of his tears. sniffling, he wipes them away, trying to make himself look at least somewhat presentable before he enters the room. once inside, he lets the door shut behind him with a soft click, before a gasp escapes him when he sees miles lying in the hospital bed. he lets out a breath when he hears the heart monitor still going, watching as miles’ mom sits at his bedside. at the sound of the door shutting, she glances back towards him, a sympathetic smile on her face.

“i should’ve expected you to stop by.” she says, standing and stepping towards him, letting go of her son’s hand.

“how is he?” jax asks, struggling to keep from crying again.

“holding on.” miles’ mom says. “he’s being very, very strong.”

“do you mind if i stay here?” jax asks. miles’ mom smiles.

“of course not.” she says. “go, you two deserve some time alone.” jax smiles, and miles’ mom steps around him, slipping out of the room. once she’s gone, jax turns back towards miles with a sigh, stepping over to the bed.

“hey.” he says as he stares at miles’ sleeping form. for a moment, he thinks about how cute miles looks when he’s so peaceful, before remembering that he now can just barely see the chocolate brown of his hair, or the light peach color of his skin. sighing, jax settles down into the seat next to the bed.

“don’t leave me.” he finds himself spitting out too quickly. he shakes his head. “that sounds kind of desperate, huh?” he sighs again. “i just... i can’t imagine life without you, miles. i, uh,” he bites his lip, tears slipping down his face yet again. he shrugs. “you’re my soulmate. w-what is life without a soulmate? it’s meaningless, it’s pointless, it’s--it’s nothing. i don’t wanna live a life like that.”

he shakes his head, licking his lips. “i love you, miles. please, _please_  don’t leave me.” he sighs shakily, reaching forward and grabbing onto miles’ hand. momentarily feeling himself give up, jax lays his head down, leaning it against miles’ arm. suddenly, though, he feels a light pressure against his hand, and he picks his head up again, staring into deep, chocolate brown eyes that squint back at him, seeming to light up with glee at the sight of him.

“hey.” miles’ says, voice rough from hours of no use. jax feels himself smile - grin, even.

“you came back.” he says, tears still streaming down his face. miles lets go of his hand, reaching up to brush a stray tear away.

“i never left.”

“yes, you did.” jax says. “i-i saw the colors beginning to slip away, a-and--”

“i’m here,” miles says, bring his hand back down to lightly squeeze jax’s. “i’m not leaving you, jax. i’ll never leave you.” jax smiles, and so does miles.

“i love you too.” he says now, gently running his thumb over jax’s knuckles. jax smiles.

“you heard me.” he says. miles smiles.

“every word.” he says. jax grins, before pushing himself onto his feet, leaning over the bed to lightly kiss miles’ on the lips. while their lips are connected, jax hears the door opening behind them, and when he decides to stand and straighten himself, he finds park, alya, and miles’ mom now standing in the doorway. jax smiles.

“he’s back.” he says. “he came back for me.”


End file.
